2016 Week 3: Only One Team Undefeated

We were all depending on Eric to keep Jeremiah’s ego in check. Alas, Eric scored his season low so far, while Jeremiah took the high ground. The high-scoring ground, that is. Both, um, gentlemen (I use the term very loosely here) had poor performances from their quarterbacks, Luck and Carr. Eric caught a glimmer of hope from WR Jordy Nelson and RB LeGarrette Blount, who each scored 22, and kicker Justin Tucker added 17. It wasn’t enough. Crown Roof’s pride of three running backs hunted down the win by putting up 59 points for ‘Miah. David Johnson, who last year had fleeting spots on no fewer than five of our rosters, solidified his first-round status with 22 points, Zeke Elliot continued his stand-out rookie season with 16, and Demarco Murray surprised with 21. Hell, even Crown’s tight end added 14. Not too shabby. Crown Roof beat Quagnis’ Bad FF Team 112 – 87, and stands alone at the top of our young yet competitive season with a 3 – 0 record.

Speaking of running backs, our other rookie, Patrick Imhof, had a couple of them go nuts in his game against Adrian Simser. The remarkable thing about this pair is that they are on the same team in the real world. This was the picture: going into the Monday night game, Patrick’s DigBick Imhof was ahead of Simser’s team, Autopicker AD by a score of 66 – 50. Simser had four players to go: QB Matt Ryan, RB Mark Ingram, WR Brandin Cooks, and TE Jake Tamme. Meanwhile, Imhof had two, the Atlanta backfield committee of Devonta Freeman and Tevin Coleman. To all observers, Autopicker had this one in the bag. I mean come on…Adrian had a decent quarterback, a clear starting running back, the number-one receiver for Drew Brees (playing at home, no less), and then another guy who might add a few points. This against two guys who will split the RB workload and maybe get a score or two between them. No. In the wonderful any-given-week world of NFL football, the Atlanta Falcons had other plans. They went into the Superdome and gave the Saints a good talking-to. Simser’s boys put up 40 points which, in a normal week, would have given him the win by 5 – 10 points. The Atlanta duo of Freeman and Coleman, however, did not have a normal week. They found the end zone four times between them and scored 26…each. A remarkable 52 points came from two RBs on the same team. That might be something special. DigBick takes the win, 118 – 90 over Autopicker.

The high-flying game of the week saw Defending the West virtually visit Team Kallander. This one was a shoot-out, where each team had three positions score over 20 (yet both tight ends netted under 4). Justin was fortunate enough to have Detroit’s Matt Jones in one of his receiver slots: Jones was one of the top scorers of the week, with 32 points. Adding to that, Justin got 23 out of Lashaun McCoy and 20 from Todd Gurley. On the other side of the scoreboard, Caleb saw Drew Brees put up 25, Christine Michael add 22, and the inspired Minnesota defense score 25 as they beat Carolina on the road. The difference in this game came down to the flex position, which favored Justin by 10. Team Kallander had the second-highest score of the week with 121, but had the clear misfortune to play the guy with the first. Defending the West got close to the rarified air of 140 points, winning the game 133 – 121.

We all heard a great sigh of extas-, I mean relief, from Nicole as Rob Gronkowski took to the field of play once again. This game wasn’t much more for him than extended calisthenics, but I don’t think that mattered to Nicole. As long as he Gronk was in on some snaps & showed he was okay, Nicole was willing to throw this game away. And with the help of Cam Newton, she did exactly that. You can’t blame her though. Playing at home against Minnesota, Cam should have had some bigger numbers. But as stated earlier, the Minnesota defense was inspired. Anyway, Cam and RB Shane Vereen both had 12, kicker Mason Crosby had 11, and WR Michael Crabtree added 10 for Nicole. Those were her double-digit scorers. Nick Simon tried to give the game to Nicole, but she was not having it. On Nick’s side, he also had only four scores in double-digits, but one was 17 (RB Charles Sims) and the other was one more remarkable defensive score, 32 by Kansas City. Thank god, because Ben Roethlisberger did even worse than Cam Newton, scoring only 6. Led by the Kansas City D, dA cHaMp took this one, 88 – 69.

The snoozer game this week saw the Untarnished Krones play host to the winless Nordic Love Gods, a team that jumped back to an 0 – 2 start in the difficult West division. Matt Stafford put up some good numbers at QB for Craig, 26 points, and Dez Bryant was the recipient of #DakAttack’s first NFL touchdown on his way to 10 points. The rest of Craig’s team took a dump, ending Sunday night with 65 points. Meanwhile, RB Lamar Miller’s 10 points were the only bright spot for the Love Gods by Sunday night, who fell far behind with a score of 47. Jason and the Love Gods needed something good to happen with the New Orleans offense at home, as WR Brandin Coleman had yet to play for the Saints. Oh, and Coby “Non-Factor” Fleener was also slated to play. Coleman was a last-minute addition to the Jason’s roster, mind you, after it was confirmed Willie Snead would not play. And I’ll be damned if it wasn’t Fleener who came through with the points. Coleman scored a respectable 7, but Fleener tore it up for a tight end, catching balls for 109 yards and a TD, giving Jason 16 points. The Nordic Love Gods won their first game of the season, beating the Untarnished Krones 70 – 65.

Good luck in week 4!

Week 3 gut feelings

Victor Cruz gets his salsa on. (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)
Victor Cruz gets his salsa on. (Photo by Elsa/Getty Images)

Week 2 is in the books. There were some surprise performers, some consistent, some so-so, and some outright bad. Fantasy football is awesome for this very reason.  We start the year with so many stats and numbers regarding last year’s performances and projections of what might be in the coming year, then we watch as the actuals unfold. It’s still a little early in the year for trends to have taken full effect and heck, trends are always meant to be broken and changed. But so far, through two weeks of gut feelings I’m 2 for 16 in my predictions. To be honest, that’s better then I thought I would be. To dig a little deeper and to look at some of my own trends, I nailed Matt Forte being the number 1 RB of the week. And darn it, Corey Coleman was not only a top 20 WR but a top a 4 WR. Both of these predictions just happened to be a week early. So if there Is a trend to my gut being a week off, let me adjust and say this: look for Marcus Mariota to be a top 10 QB, Drew Brees to throw for 400 yards and 4 TDs, Tyrrell Williams to post 100-plus yards and a TD (which he almost hit in week 2), and Ezekiel Elliott to be the number 1 fantasy RB of the week.

Five receptions for 104 yards and 2 TDs. This was Corey Coleman’s line from week 2. He had whatever QB the Browns picked up off the corner that morning throwing to him. Corey Coleman posted those numbers against a suspicious Ravens secondary. This week a highly drafted, yet underperforming player gets a chance to turn his season  around against the same Ravens’ secondary. Allen Robinson gets to take on that Ravens team that allowed a back-up QB and a rookie WR to look like hall-of-famers. Allen Robinson is projected as the 4th WR of week 3, but his fantasy owners can sleep soundly knowing their investment is about to cash in. Allen Robinson will be the top WR in week 3.

Odell Beckham Jr. vs. Josh Norman rematch. Football doesn’t get much better than when you see real emotion from the players. Okay, they went too far last year, looking like they were about to fist fight on national television. With the new rules in place this year will they both even make it through the game? Besides good TV, there will be fantasy implications. Looking at the Giants’, Odell Beckham Jr. is the 3rd-ranked among all WRs, Sterling Shepard is ranked 26th, and Victor Cruz is 44th. As the heavyweight belt is going down between Norman and Beckham Jr., I’ll be looking for dancing. Salsa dancing, that is. Victor Cruz will be the best fantasy receiver on either team when the Giants face the Redskins.

Let’s play Who Am I: I was drafted in the first round in fantasy football drafts, but I’m ranked 37th at my position entering week 3. I have 20-plus fewer points than Melvin Gordon, Isiah Crowell, and undrafted Spencer Ware. I have a 2-week total of 10 fantasy points. Who am I? I’m Todd Gurley. No way! Yes, this is all true, and as I said, I could have given you plenty more names of guys ahead of him (33, to be exact). Happily, I do not own one share of Todd Gurley in the 2016 season. For that alone I am truly thankful. The Rams suck, their schedule sucks, and Todd Gurley will not be able to do anything about it single-handedly. What do you do as a Todd Gurley owner?  The pine is a good option this week. Put him in the flex, at best. Gurley will be on the outside looking in on the top 20 RBs again in week 3.

Marcus Mariota will end up being a top-10 QB. That means he will need to throw the ball a good amount, and successfully. Tajae Sharpe has 18 targets in 2 weeks. Sharpe and Mariota will connect, as Oakland has handed out receptions and yards like candy on Halloween. Tajae Sharpe is ranked 30th on the week; he will end up top-10. Amari Cooper could get himself in to the top 10 as well, as this could turn into a shoot-out down in Tennessee.

In week 2, the Jets almost had three 100-yard receivers and added a 100-yard rusher. This week they visit Kansas City as the Chiefs welcome Jamaal Charles back into the lineup. Minus Charles, the Chiefs are not known for fantasy output, but in week 3 in Arrowhead stadium they will have a performance like the Jets had last week. Maclin, Kelce, and Ware will all have 100 receiving yards and Ware will add the 100 yards rushing. Charles will be limited. Okay, this prediction is admittedly a stretch. There is not a chance of this happening against even a soft match-up, let alone the Jets. But it will be fun to see how close it gets.

Ryan Tannehill has had some huge fantasy performances, just enough and just frequest enough to always have the fantasy industry talking about him. He gets the Browns this week. Of course everyone and their mom is on him to have a big week. I wanted to go the route of him falling on his face and being dreadful but if I’m staying true to my gut, I belive Ryan Tannehill will the the best QB in week 3. Look for Tannehill and Devante Parker to have a great game.

The Bengals get to host the Broncos, against whom WR production dies. The Packers get to host the resurgent-gone-bad Lions. For the Bengals, A.J. Green is looking for redemption from a bad week 2. For the Packers, Jordy Nelson is trying prove why we drafted him in the top three rounds. The rankings slide A.J. in at 14 and Jordy in at 5 for week 3. I want to say they will both be outside top 15 at WR, but I will just go with A.J. Green out-performing Jordy Nelson in fantasy points in week 3.

Monday night will decide many fantasy battles in week 3. It will possibly win people thousands of dollars in daily fantasy. Matt Ryan, undrafted in almost all ten-team leagues, is now the number 1 fantasy QB. Drew Brees is number 4. Inside the dome in New Orleans they should both be awsome plays. But let’s take a step sideways and look at the tight end situation. One was drafted as the 6th tight end off the board. The other was virtually undrafted as the 19th tight end. One has 16 targets on the year, the other 12. One is the 6th best tight end through two weeks and the other is, well there are way too many to count before you find Coby Fleener. That’s right: Jacob Tamme of the Atlanta Falcons, nearly undrafted, is currently the 4th-best tight end in standard-scoring leagues, while highly regarded Coby Fleener has been a non-factor. We have seen the fantasy goodness of tight ends in New Orleans, but do the Coby Fleener owners have the guts to start him? Heck do they have the guts to keep him on their roster? I myself am a Gronk drafter wherever I can so I don’t have any Coby Fleener this year, but look at the positive: any tight end who gets on the field is better than an injured Gronk. Week 3 at the Superdome will see both tight ends post top-5 scores. Will you have the guts to keep them in your line ups?

Well, here is to hoping for the best in week 3. May you see the path to the pot at the end of the rainbow filled with fantasy points. There are many ways to get there. Do you trust obvious, go-to match ups? Do you need to throw some back-ups in because of injury? Can you get yourself to leave a guy in your lineup who has done nothing for you so far? Do you need to throw a hail mary to not get the dreaded L? Whatever the situation, there are many paths to a fantasy victory. Finding that path is what makes this game so damn fun.

2016 Week 2: Two 2-0, Two 0-2

This week saw two of our teams move to 2 – 0 and two others fall to 0 – 2. Based on past performances (dating back several seasons in some cases), one might consider only one of those four teams to fit where it is. Crown Roof, a former champion yet a team that last year took the first few weeks to get settled, is now one of the two undefeated teams. The other three teams are a bit of a surprise. Crown is joined at the top by one of our rookies, Quagnis’ Bad FF Team, who has defied his name and put up the top score two weeks in a row. In the cellar are one of last year’s contenders, the Nordic Love Gods, and last year’s scoring champ, dA cHaMp.

It seems every week we get a reminder of how far scores can swing with a given group of guys. This week, that reminder seems more vivid than usual. The Untarnished Krones, looking strong after a 125-point outing in week 1, took on Defending the West, a team that also put up a respectable 97 last week. Instead of packing any excitement at all, this one turned into the Snoozer Bowl. By Sunday afternoon, both Craig and Justin were scratching their heads, wondering when their guys were going to wake up and score. Wide Receivers Dez Bryant and Marvin Jones were the only two guys on both starting rosters who put up semi-reasonable numbers. In the end, Defending the West scored 65, while the Untarnished Krones underperformed with a whiplash-inducing score of 53, a seventy-two point drop from week 1. It’s a fickle game we play, kids. Look for the Krones to score 175 next week against the Nordic Love Gods. (Note: not a real prediction.)

Speaking of the Love Gods, they were in action against Crown Roof. Jason took a gamble on Russell Wilson and his sprained ankle, and it was the wrong move. Jason’s backup QB, Tyrod Taylor, scored 23 which would have given him the win. On the other side of the field, the Denver D/ST lit up the Indianapolis Colts like a blowtorch to a birthday cake, scoring two TDs, pulling down an interception, and recovering a fumble. They were men possessed, and this week they were Jeremiah’s men. By the Monday night game, Jason needed 16 points from WR Alshon Jeffrey to win the game, and he came tantalizingly close but dropped a pass in the end zone. Crown Roof ended up taking home the win, 97 – 91. As an aside, Jeremiah’s bench looked good in this game too, and the gamble on rookie Zeke Elliot is paying off so far.

The Arizona D/ST was at about the same altitude, points-wise, as Denver this week, scoring 22 points of their own. The lucky owner? Nicole Holand. She took on Adrian Simser this week who, in a show of great sportsmanship, changed his team name to Auto Pick 1. Nicole also benefitted from having the week’s high-scorer on her team, Cam Newton. Though Carson Palmer put up 24 for Adrian, Cam won the position battle with 29. Nicole and her Gronkless Gronk ‘a’ Holic also had a great day from Latavius Murray with 15, and Michael Crabtree with a very efficient 9 points in the flex. Adrian got good numbers out of his TE Delanie Walker (14) and K Graham Cano (17), but they weren’t enough to make up for the shallowness in the RB/WR end of his pool. Gronk ‘a’ Holic took this one, 97 – 83 over Auto Pick 1.

Caleb and Team Kallander went after redemption this week after dropping their game in week 1. Caleb remembered the hundred or so points put together by the Giants and Saints last year, and told Drew Brees to get after it again. Sadly, Drew didn’t. However, Caleb was not to be denied and he put up some good numbers almost all the way across the board, with one exception: Adrian Peterson scored only a point before leaving his game frustrated and injured. RB Matt Forte really came through for Team Kallander though, with a 28-point day. WR Stefon Diggs tried to turn the table for dA cHaMp with a 24-point outing, but he got no help at all from RB Arian Foster’s zero points. Nick had the points to tie the game on his bench, but if you were to ask anyone, on any given week, whether Cleveland WR Corey Coleman would make a better fantasy starter than Odell Beckham Jr., the answer would obviously be “no.” You can’t fault the guy for starting the star, but Coleman out-scored Beckham Jr. this week, 22 – 8. The final score of this game was 106 – 92, Team Kallander over dA cHaMp. Incidentally, if you rearrange the capitalized letters in Nick’s team name, they spell “ham.” Mmmmmm…ham.

And then we had our Rookie Bowl, where our two undefeated rookies met each other for the first time. (Of course they did: they’re both new to the League, and it’s only week 2. Jesus.) This was a balanced, high-scoring game. DigBick’s RB Tevin Coleman, fresh off the waiver wire, outscored Quagnis’ Danny Woodhead. Going the other way, Quagnis’ Julio Jones outscored Amari Cooper at WR. Back and forth it went, and the real difference came from Quagnis’ flex and kicker. At those two positions, Kelvin Benjamin and Justin Tucker put up 37, while Tyler Locket and Steven Hauschka only managed 12 for DigBick. At the final buzzer, Quagnis’ Bad FF Team came out on top, 121 – 103 over DigBick Imhof. Looking forward, both gentlemen have decent benches. Eric is getting some balanced scoring from Frank Gore and LeGarrette Blount, while Tom Brady and Le’Veon Bell are awaiting their first starts for Patrick. The premier matchup in week 3 is clearly Quagnis v. Crown, and week 5 will see Patrick, with both Brady and Bell active, tangling with Nick Simon. Our rookies are certainly forces to be reckoned with.

Fun fact: a team filled ONLY with Patriots players would have scored 92 this week, beating or tying fully half our League.

Good luck next week!

Week 2 Gut Feelings

Week 1 is in the books. There was plenty of excitement on the field: high scoring games, overtime, and a 2-point conversion for the win. Wow! NFL is back and I personally am pumped. With all the excitement on the real field, it made the virtual field just as exciting. Plenty of fantasy gems, even more fantasy heart breaks. In the Grown Men’s League we had one match-up come down to the Sunday night game and 2 match-ups come down to the Monday contest. Did I mention week 1 was exciting? What made the week the best was Monday night’s Battle of California. One starting RB drafted in the first round and one drafted in the fourth round. I said that 4th-rounder would out-score the 1st rounder on the virtual field. It was not even close as Carlos Hyde showed Todd Gurley what a 1st-round fantasy pick is supposed to do. Hey, 1 out of 8 isn’t bad.

Before I state my week-two gut feelings I need to put something to bed. As I write these next few sentences I ask you to imagine some nice soft slow sad music. Mr. Robert Griffin III…hmmm. I had faith that your stock would be restored. When you first arrived on the scene in 2012 I was the first to draft you. We had such a wonderful time. As you racked up 3,200 passing yards and 20 touchdowns, you added 120 rushing attempts for 815 yards and 7 touchdowns. Hmmm…it was good. It was nice. It was Beautiful! Three years passed and I continued to draft you. You landed in Cleveland with a fresh start. There was hope. Even a little national positivity. I drafted you in 2016 Mr. Robert Griffin III. And then I dropped you one week into the 2016 season as you suffered yet another injury. Alas, this is goodbye, Robert Griffin III. You will never see my roster again. I will always remember the times we shared but in this relationship, it is definitely you and not me.

And now to my gut feelings.

Antonio Brown vs A.J. Green. Does anyone really care? Not me because neither are on my fantasy team. I don’t think anyone expects anything less than greatness from these two. And if they don’t, no one will feel bad for you because you still have Antonio Brown or A.J. Green on your team. In week 1 Big Ben put up 22 fanatsy points and is ranked as the 7th QB in week 2. Andy Dalton put up 16 fantasy points in week 1 and is ranked as the 14th QB in week 2. Because of A.J. Green, Andy Dalton will go into Pittsburgh  and have the better fanatsy day.

The Titans have come out this year trying to run people over. They run exotic smash mouth. Demarco Murray will have another good week but Marcus Mariota will be the story here, as he becomes a top-10 QB this week, despite being projected as the 18th.

With Keenan Allen out for the season, can someone step up to be fanatsy-relevant for San Diego? Last year when Allen went out no one decided they wanted to take the reins. Tyrrell Williams (who?) will take a shot. In week 2, he will have over 100 yards and a touchdown. We’ll see if it lasts.

The Lions are at home for the first time this year. Lions fans have seen what bad football is. Is there excitement back in Detroit? Maybe for a handful of fans. The Lions under Jim Bob Cooter have been productive and effective. Vegas has an over/under of 47.5 for their week 2 match-up, and they are favored by 6. I say the Lions disappoint once again. They will not only lose, but not score over 20 points.

Drew Brees had over 400 yards and 4 touchdowns in week 1, yet he has a bad track record outdoors. Forget all that. He just got paid. He has all types of weapons. Drew Brees will put up 400-plus passing yards and 4 touchdowns. Watch out for Coby Fleener.

Ezekiel Elliott! Number one RB in ESPN standard leagues in week 2. Enough said.

Is this 2015? The 49ers looked like a team to be reckoned with in the black jerseys while stomping the Vikings in 2015. 2016 started with a bang once again for the 49ers, who held the Rams to 0 points. (No, I don’t know if the Rams are actually qualified to be called an NFL franchise but 0 points is 0 points.) Despite the shutout, the Niners are getting no respect as they head to Carolina, being 14-point underdogs. The 49ers will win. Not! But they’ll beat the spread.

As I try to improve on a 1 and 8 start in my guy feelings, I want it to be known that just because I have a gut feeling doesn’t mean I will personally act on it. In my first smack post of the year I stated I’m out for the points leader trophy this year, and if that means going against my gut then so be it. With one week of data to draw from, do you follow the numbers or your gut?

2016 Week1: Champ Spanked, Rookies Shine

Week 1 of the 2016 NFL season has been put to bed, Lady and Gentlemen, and it had more drama than a slumber party of 15-year-olds. I have raised daughters. I know.

The big story this week is that our2015 champ, Caleb Kalander, was soundly beaten by Craig Ericson. Play was fairly evenly matched between the two men at QB, WR2, and TE. Every other line was lopsided, mostly in Craig’s favor. I will point out, however, that the big tilt in Caleb’s favor was at D/ST: The Vikings managed to put up 21 points on defense against the Tennessee Titans. When your defense is the second-highest scoring line on your roster in any given week, that means your defense was either extraordinary or the rest of your people stunk it up. For Team Kallander, it was the latter. To be fair, RB Matt Forte and WR Mike Evans didn’t actually perform badly…but everyone else did. On the Krone’s side of the scoreboard, RBs Carlos Hyde and Ameer Abdullah tore it up, and WR A. J. Green was even better. The final score in this one was 125 – 95, Krones over Kallander.

The runner-up from 2015, Nordic Love Gods, took on FY Brody…wait, I mean Auto Pick. Much to Jason’s utter astonishment, Russell Wilson, undroppable Russell Wilson, scored only 11 points. Eleven. Points. (Not that Jason would drop Russell Wilson, that’s simply how good ESPN thinks he is: good enough for the undroppable list.) After a stellar performance by WR Brandin Cooks, Adrian’s algorithmically allocated team was up by nine going into the Monday night games. Adrian still had Antonio Brown to play, while Jason had Brown’s teammate, DeAngelo Williams. DeAngelo Williams did his damnedest for Jason, putting up a whopping 28 points. Sadly, it wasn’t enough, as Antonio Brown scored 24, giving the game to Auto Pick by five, 115 – 110. In other news, Adrian was finally able to log on Sunday, and has since changed the name of his team to SimserConst 1. Welcome back, Adrian. Another side note: This was the only game this week where the top scorer on both teams was NOT a QB.

It’s always exciting when the Walter brothers duke it out, and this one was no different. Rookie RB Zeke Elliot turned in a solid11-point performance for Crown Roof, David Johnson of Arizona added 18, and Spencer Ware of KC threw in a really nice 25. Defending the West got some decent numbers out of TE Dwayne Allen, RB LeSean McCoy and K Dan Bailey. On Monday evening, the game was hoisted onto RB Todd Gurley’s shoulders…who was absolutely shut down by the 49ers defense. The Rams lost 28 -0, and Gurley scored only 4 fantasy points. Justin was as disappointed in Gurley as Jason was in Russell Wilson. Side note: DeAngelo Williams would have won Justin the game, if he were on Justin’s roster.

In the low-scoring game this week, newcomer Patrick Imhof took on last year’s #1 playoff seed, Nicole Holand. Sadly for Nicole, Cam Newton appears to be human after all, scoring a mere 20 points this week. Even more sadly for her, Loverboy Gronkowski was unable to play against Arizona this week, forcing her to settle for a single point from Martellus Bennett at TE. Patrick took advantage. By Monday’s Arizona game, his team was down only three, 67 – 64. Patrick wasn’t skeered, he wasn’t even nervous. Why? Because he had WR Larry Fitzgerald in his starting lineup. Fitzy, in the second year of a three-year contract extension, showed Patrick why he is still considered a top-notch WR and all-around great guy. He added 20 points to Patrick’s bottom line, giving the rookie his first win to open the season. The final in this one was 84 – 73, DigBick Imhof over Gronk ‘a’ Holic.

And then there was Quagnis. Eric Martens, our other rookie, took on last year’s points leader Nick Simon. Eric proclaimed a feeling for–I mean about–Andrew Luck on draft day, snagging him with the 65th pick. That may well end up being the draft’s best value pick. Luck did not disappoint, putting up 35 points for Quagnis’ Bad FF Team. Then RB C.J. Anderson came along and added 25. Together, those two players accounted for nearly half of Eric’s output this week. Meanwhile, dA Champ had a blah game. Like overcooked oatmeal, it was without excitement. Oh wait, he did get one good performance: Julius Thomas from Jacksonville put up 12 points at tight end. Other than that one raisin, it was a bland bowl of…blandness. Martens absolutely ran away with this contest, 127 – 82 over Simon.

Next week, only one rookie will remain undefeated, as the two of them meet for battle. Good luck to everyone in week 2!

Week 1 Gut Feelings

As we get ready for the full slate of Sunday’s games and look over our rosters…and relook….and stress over their match ups, I’d like to share some of my gut feelings.

Can Corey Coleman be a top 20 WR this week? Does anyone have faith in the Browns (mostly RGIII)? I know one person who does, and that is I! The eagles defense has been week at times, especially to the number 1 WR of opposing teams. Maybe they will be better with an offense geared more toward time of possession, but I have faith in a new-look Cleveland Browns team. Lock Corey Coleman in as a top option this week.

How about Frank Gore? Yes, he may be old as the dinosaurs. No, he is not a super sexy or bold choice in fantasy. The Colts and Lions have one of the highest over-unders of the week. So Vegas says lots of points will be scored. Vegas is never wrong…right? With everyone excited about the WRs in this match up, I say Frank Gore—currently ranked by ESPN as the 16th RB—cracks the top 5 on the week.

Speaking of Vegas, there is no separation between the Cowboys and Giants on the consensus odds board. Even Vegas is on board the Dak train! I think Dak Prescott is a top-10 fantasy QB this week.

Back to old running backs: how about one that was there for the taking in the middle rounds of the draft, Matt Forte. Not a great match up for Forte, but the Bengals are just middle of the road for fanatsy points given up to running backs. If these old running backs can’t do it when they’re fresh, then when? Matt Forte will work the early-season legs and finish the top RB this week.

They say start all your Oakland Raiders against the Saints. I agree because I believe the Saints jump out to an early lead in the Superdome. The Raiders will be throwing to catch up. Latavis Murray is currently ranked at RB11 on ESPN; I say he finishes outside the top 20 in standard scoring.

I think everyone and their moms have writing off the Chicago Bears this year. They might not have many wins on the year but that doesn’t mean there isn’t fanatsy gold to be had. Alshon Jeffery will out-score DeAndre Hopkins this week.

Doug Martin is good right? There were 24 RBs drafted in between Doug Martin and backup Charles Sims. The Falcons are notorious for giving it up to pass-catch backs. Charles Sims will out-score Doug Martin.

Yes, Monday night football! One of the highlights of the week. A true battle of excellent talent, and the first chance to see if the Todd Gurley hype is true. But I belive the Niners’ Chip Kelly has some magic left in that play book of his, which will benefit Carlos Hyde. I say Hyde  will out-perform the consensus number 1 RB in fantasy points, week 1.

Here’s to the first Sunday in the 2016 season!

Jeremiah’s 2016 Bold Predictions

So there are bold predictions by a lot of different people each NFL season. My league mates in the Grown Men’s League would agree that I’m not scared to be bold on the fanatsy football field. I’ll roll out players that no one believes in, take RGIII, for example. I’ll not play a defense or a kicker just to hold a player on my bench or to make sure I don’t get negative points. I love to have fun each week and roll the dice, which is the main reason I have never been any where close to the points leader in any of my fantasy leagues. But I love this game we play and will continue to do bold things week in and week out. In that spirit, here are my bold predictions for all 32 NfL teams in 2016.

Minnesota Vikings: The starting quarterback for the Minnesota Vikings will throw over 28 touchdowns. In 2015 Teddy Bridgwater had 14. With Bridgewater out, Minnesota will now face teams crowding the box. This will give the Vikes the opportunity to open up the downfield coverage.

Green Bay Packers: Eddy Lacy will have his best statistical year. He will have more then 1200 rushing yards and double-digit touchdowns. In 2013, Eddy Lacy had 1178 yards and 11 tds. In 2014 he had 1139 yards and 9 tds. 2015 was even worse, with 758 yards and 3 tds. This is the year Eddie finds his groove.

Chicago Bears: Jeremy Langford will have over 1000 rushing yards, 50-plus receptions, and double-digit touchdowns, far out-performing his Sept. 1 ESPN standard ADP.

Detroit Lions: The Detroit Lions are rejuvenated under Jim Bob Cooter. Lots of people belive in Mathew Stafford this year so I won’t go there. Instead, my prediction will focus on the WR/RB corps. The Lions will have 3 top-25 fantasy players between those two positions: Golden Tate and Marvin Jones, WR,  and Ameer Abdullah, RB. All three will be top-25 in their positins by the end of the year.

Atlanta Falcons: Devonta Freeman will break Matt Forte’s single-season RB reception record of 102. Freeman had 73 receptions in 2015, but Atlanta sucks, period, and will be down in a lot of games and will be throwing a lot.

Carolina Panthers: Devin Funchess will be the best fantasy WR on the team. He will beat Kelvin Benjamin’s 1008 yards and 9 TDs in 2014.

New Orleans Saints: C.j. Spiller is fantasy relevant again? Well maybe not relevant, but he’s gonna catch some balls this year. Spiller will have more than 50 receptions after racking up 34 in 2015. Spiller will also have more receptions than Mark Ingram this year.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Jameis Winston will have over 5000 passing yards. His 2015 total was 4042.

Dallas Cowboys: I know Jerry Jones has a man crush on Tony Romo but that will be over. His eye will turn towards Dak. Tony Romo will never start another game in Dallas.

New York Giants: O’Dell Beckham Jr. will set the new record for receiving yards in an NFL season, breaking the 2000-yard mark. Calvin Johnson holds the record with 1964 yards in 2012.

Piladelphia Eagles: The Carson Wentz-lead eagles will win the divison. They will have to win week 16 against the Giants and week 17 against the Cowboys, but both games are at home.

Washington Redskins: Rob Kelly will be the third-best fantasy rookie running back. That’s all.

Arizona Cardinals: I stole this bold prediction from the Fantasy Footballers but I like it: David Johnson will break Darren Sproles’ single-season all-purpose yards of 2696. Since I stole that one I’ll throw in this one: Michael Floyd will have the most receiving TDs this year by a WR.

Los Angeles Rams: Tavon Austin will tie Devin Hester’s single season kick/punt return for TD record. In 2007, Devin Hester had 4 kick returns and 2 punt returns for touchdowns. What else do the Rams really have to look forward to?

San Francisco 49ers: Vance McDonald will have 800-plus yards and 8 TDs. Chip Kelly’s 3 years in Philly produced good numbers for Zach Ertz and Brent Celek. Their 3-year average together was 1088 yards and 6.3 TDs. Vance McDonald will far out-perform is ADP. This year’s Gary Barnidge?

Seattle Seahawks: Will miss the playoffs. What? Holy #$%@!!! Really? Yes. They will not win their division.

Baltimore Ravens: Will win their division. Little cherry on top: Mike Wallace will have double-digit TDs.

Cincinnati Bengals: A.J. Green will have the most receptions in the NFL in 2016. In 2015, Antonio Brown and Julio Jones tied with 136 receptions. Green will end with more.

Cleveland Browns: Let’s be honest the Browns would be the favorite for last place in the divison. But I beilive. What the I belive in truly with the Browns is yet unclear but RG3 will be a top 12 fantasy qb. His adp is qb 25 going at 132 overall. Not enough? Isiah Crowell will be a top 20 rb. His adp is 41 among rb and 123 over all. You heard it hear first and let’s be honest I’m the only one stupid enough to say something like that.

Pittsburg Steelers: I want to come up with something here but big Ben has done alot of impressive stuff. Antonio Brown well he’s Antonio Brown. They also have a pretty awsome rb named Bell. So I’ll just follow suit…Pittsburg will make the super bowl but they have to get there as a wild card.

Houston Texans: The Texans have alot of new faces. So not much data to support a hole lot. I’m just going to say DeAndre Hopkins is outside the top 10 at wr in fantasy.

Indianapolis Colts: Donte Moncrief will be the best fantasy wr on the Colts. In 2015 T.Y. Hilton had 69 receptions 1124 yards and 5 tds. Same year Moncrief had 64 receptions 733 yards and 6 tds. T.Y. Hilton adp is 17 among wr and Moncrief is going 26th.

Jacksonville Jaguars: This team will double there rushing total from 2015. 5! 5 rushing tds for the hole Jaguars offense. 2 for Yeldon. 1 for Denard Robinson. 2 for Blake Bortles. Can they get 10 rushing tds as a team?

Tennessee Titans: Somewhere among thr pack of wr this team has assembled will come a top 25 fantasy wr. The first wr taken in fantasy drafts is at we 54. 133 over all.

Buffalo Bills: Sammy Watkins will be the number 2 fantasy wr. Let’s be honest if Beckham gets over 2000 yards he’ll be number 1. Sammy missed 4 games last year. In his 12 games he played he only had 4 games will 6 or more catches. In those games he scored 74 fanatsy points. Project that over 16 games he would have been the number 1 wr last year. Just feed him the rock!

Sidenote: Yes I happen to have the wr being drafted at 54 at wr from the Titans and Sammy Watkins. I’m not biased.

Miami Dolphins: Arian Foster will play all 16 games! I beilive that may be the boldest bold yet.

New England Patriots: So Jason talks alot of smack about not drafting Mr. Gronk. But as he had said Nicole Holand now know as Gronk a holic was the number 1 seed in the playoffs. She did not come away with the ultimate prize but hey who doesn’t want to be the number 1 seed. In 2011 Mr. Gronk had 90 receptions 1327 yards and 17 tds. Yes 17tds! He will break all those numbers in 2016!

New York Jets: Ryan Fitzpatrick had a career year last year. He will one up himself. We will throw over 40 tds in 2016. No goal lone back. And Brandon Marshall has a bet to win.

Denver Broncos: Virgil Green will be a top 10 tight end. He is being drafted 24th among tight ends. 170the over all. Undrafted that is. This year’s Gary Barnidge? Yes I asked that about Vance McDonald but if I pick 2 tight ends I have a better shot at being right.

Kansas City Cheifs: Alex Smith had a 1000 yard recover in 2015. Do it again? Maybe have 2 1000 yard receivers? Travis Kelce will be run away number 2 tight end in fantasy. In 2015 he had 875 yards and 5 tds. He will break 1000 yards and 8 tds. Hey he’s not a wr but he would make to players with 1000 receiving yards.

Oakland Raiders: I wanted to come up with something for Amari Cooper or maybe Derek Carr. Hey they got a rookie rb that has alot of hype. Even Murray could do some good things in that offense. I just say the Raiders end up last in the divison. Just because they are Oakland and I’m a Vikings fan that likes to see other teams be bad.

San Diego Chargers: Phillip Rivers will have more then 5476 passing yards. That would put him second on the the list for most passing yards in a season. I don’t want him to take down Payton Manning record so I gave him second. In 2015 Rivers had his most passing ever with 4792.

Yes fanatsy is a stupid game. It’s the stupid game that I love. It brings us together. Plain and simple it’s fun. I love numbers and stats but it’s so much more fun to be bold. So hopefully I maybe hit on one of my picks because that would just be awsome! More then anything this list just shows how fun this game is. Anything is possible and don’t be afraid to be bold.

We’re Live

This is the 2014 champ Crown. Well Crown Roof because I can’t just have crown on espn site. I want to let the Grown Men’s League—and the world I guess—know that Crown Roof will be a force to be reckoned with. While all my fellow league mates are just trying to reach the top of the mountain, I have much higher standards. Former champ: check. Best record in a season: check. Just all around a top notch guy: check. Well I made enough kids must not be all that bad. But my sites are on a trophy, like a man running with anger and a vengeance. A trophy for points leader. A trophy to soon be engraved, well just a cheap little name plate but whatever, with the Crown name. #pointsleader #Crownroof

Welcome to the 2016 Season

Welcome, Grown Men, to the 2016 fantasy football season! We’ve got some changes in store this year which should make the end of the season a little more exciting:

  • The championship bracket has been extended to 6 teams. The top two seeds get first-round byes.
  • Playoff games will only be one week long. One and done. You lose, you go home.
  • Playoffs will occur weeks 14 – 16.
  • In week 17, we’ll have an auction-style, one-week game (think Fanduel or Draft Kings). Everybody v. everybody, most points wins.
  • The winner of the week 17 game will receive the Wild Week trophy. Somebody should look into buying one of those.

We’re looking forward to the changes.

Draft day was held on August 28. It was a subdued event this year, set at the Reluctant Country Club. They begrudgingly opened their meeting room to us and kept one server on staff who, in between grabbing us an occasional drink, cleaned the carpets. Of course, we all felt bad for interrupting his work and apologized profusely, despite reserving the room months ago.  Frankly, we need to up our draft-day game.

Seven of us showed up in person, while three drafted online. Well, really only two drafted online, as one of us (cough coughAdrian cough) couldn’t get his login credentials right and ended up on auto-draft. That’s a lesson, kids: the day before the draft, make sure you can log in.

The top three picks were no surprise: Adrian Peterson, Antonio Brown, and Odell Beckham, Jr. It was also no surprise that Nicole took Gronk in the first, and Jeremiah ended up with 19 running backs on his 16-man roster. What was a surprise? Craig went WR – WR in the first two rounds. Dez Bryant was going to be his first-round pick before Tony Romo went down, and was still sitting there when Craig’s second pick rolled around. He couldn’t help himself.

Our first games are right around the corner, starting Thursday, September 8. Tomorrow, in other words. Justin’s new team, Defending the West, has the highest projected score, 100, while Nick’s team, da Champ, has the lowest at 81. Be sure to set your lineups! (Do I even need to remind you? If I do, you should probably find another league.)

Oh, one quick ground rule about this site: keep the language PG-13. We are visible to the entire world here; let’s show some respect to our audience and to the players whose careers we piggyback.

Best of luck to everyone this season. Let’s make it the best yet!

Jason